My First Mother's Day!

I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me.  They have clung to me all my life.  ~Abraham Lincoln

It seems like all I ever heard my mom say to me growing up is "You'll understand when you're a mom." That day finally arrived and now I truly get it. What it means to be responsible for another human being. The love and nurture and the bond shared. The feeling of having my heart walking outside of my body every time I look at Emma.

I can't believe she is mine.

This mother's day, I celebrated my very first mother's day! 

I woke up not to my alarm clock but a surprise gift from hubby right next to my bed.

He knows me well.

After I got up, I walked across the room to to this smiling sunshine! The greatest gift of all. My precious gift from God. So blessed and proud to be her mommy.

As usual, we got dressed and went to church with the fam bam. The coolest part of church was when the pastor asked for all the moms to stand up and this time I could part take in the honor. It was such a good feeling. I'm happy to join all the wonderful mommies celebrating the joys of motherhood together. 

Aftewards, we had planned to go over to my parents for lunch. Little did I know, they had planned a surprise mother's day and Emma's early 1st Birthday party with Dora decorations all over. I was really surprised to walk in and see my aunts, uncles, and cousins and my in laws!

So grateful for my parents and their kindness. They always know how to put a smile on my face and make things happen for me. 

I also got a very special gift from my mother in law representing me, osh and little Emma.  

This mother's day also marked the first G-ma day for both my mom and my mother in law, Emma being the first grandchild for both fams. 

 We had such a wonderful time together. 

Thanks to my hubby and family for making it so special for me and Emma.  

xo

El 

Osh & El Adventure Day!

Wednesday, May 9, 2012 hubby and I spent the entire day together celebrating our three year wedding anniversary. He had suggested going out of town for a few days but I'm not ready to leave Emma behind. I think I will be ok once she is walking and talking so then she can fill me in when I'm back. Ha! I wanted to do something different, local and just for a day. I agreed for Osh to do the planning as always because he is just the man when it comes to that.

I wore a flowly flower comfortable dress with flip flops since we were going to be walking a lot. Osh suggested I wear sneakers to be comfortable but c'mon who wears sneakers with a flower dress?! 

It was our first time taking the train. We left our place and walked to the station in Burbank Downtown.  Oh but first, we had to do our ritual of grabbing a Starbucks coffee for me!

By the time we got to the train station, I had already gotten a blister on my toe and I was in pain. I can hear Osh saying "I told you so." which he ended up saying eventually.

Nonetheless, the train ride was so much fun!

Our stop was the Union Station, Downtown!

It does not sound glamorous but there is so much art and culture around and it's just like getting into a different world. We walked around everywhere with my blister but I didn't want to rain on his parade so I kept mum about it in the beginning. He had done such a good job planning this day for us, I just didn't want to kill it...

By 12 noon we were starving, so we grabbed a hotdog wrapped in bacon. It was my first time trying it and it was so yummy with grilled onions too. 

I was getting pretty cranky though because of my blister and the walking made it worse but I just refused to take a cab back to Union Station because it would have defeated our adventure day! I was starting to vocalize my pain haha.

We went to Walt Disney Music Center which was so beautiful and took some pics there! 

At this point, I started crying all the way back to Union Station but not without buying something first. We got me a really cool hat! By the time we got back to the station, I was like a little baby complaining. Osh, as always being so understanding and patient with me tried to cheer me up while the whole time I was saying "I'd come back to the Union Station for a photoshoot. That would be a lovely thing to do! While crying in between! What a baby huh? LOL Sometimes I don't know how he puts up with me but I love him for being my rock!

We got back on the train and headed back to Burbank. We went to a nice sushi dinner and laughed about our day and my blister. Keep in mind I'm still walking back home, which I did. 

What a day! I'll never forget our 3 year anniversary :) Even though I was in pain, looking back I'm so happy we did what we did. We created a lot of memories and firsts. 

Even though our adventure was just for a day, the next few days he surprised me with the coolest gifts, flowers and other treats ;)

I love my hubby like a guy loves ESPN.

So grateful for my hubster.

⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
⁸ Love never fails.

1 Cor 13:4-8

xo

El

The Joys of Motherhood

One of the most fulfilling job is being a mother and it just never ends no matter how old the children become.

Lisa Bevere posted some of the advice other moms gave and here are my favorite ones.

• Always be ready with open arms and an open door, just like the prodigal son’s father—even when they are coming home from the pigsty! (Debbie)

• A friend of mine always asks her kids, “How can I be a better mum?” I’ve started to do that with my girls, and it’s great hearing how each of them feels loved in a different way. (Jill)

• When your kids grow up and leave your home, you’ll never wish you’d kept a cleaner house. (Angie)

• Never call your child a bad name; they will live up to it. (Peggy)

• If you plant good roots, your children will always come back to them. (Mona

• Be the example you wants your kids to follow. (Joyonna)

• Take your kids to church no matter how many or how difficult the obstacles!  (Rhonda)

• Be consistent and always follow through with what you say. (Jennifer)

• Have a strong and godly marriage in front of your children. They learn so much about honoring the Lord, themselves, and others by watching Mom and Dad. Respect, compromise, and truly love one another on purpose and visibly. (Denise)

• Don’t be afraid to admit you make mistakes and never be too big to apologize when you are wrong. It teaches humility. (Latoya)

• Take whatever your child gives you—even if it’s just a weed—and act like it’s the most important thing you’ve ever received. It’s all they have to give, and they chose to give it to you! (Jennifer)

• Be watchful for when your child opens the window to their soul. Be ready to speak words of encouragement, life, and truth. (Shannon)

• The crown you place on your child’s head will be the one they grow into. (Beckah)

• Enjoy every moment. It goes by fast, so don’t miss it wishing things were different.  (Brittany)

• Always speak life over your children. Say what God says about them! (Tara)

• Don’t be weird Christian parents! Make sure you have fun with your kids, and they’ll know that living for God is the best! (Louise)

• You’re always doing better than you think you are. (Jennifer)

• Show your child the same grace that Jesus shows you everyday. (Maryam)

• Learn to parent the child you have, not the one in parenting books. (Debbie)

• Discipline is something we do for our children, not to our children. (Claudia)

• Remember what seems little to you may be huge to them. (Heather)

Becoming a Mom

I will be celebrating my very first Mother's Day this Sunday, May 13, 2012. I am so excited to finally join in with all the wonderful moms in celebrating the joy of being a mom.

It took me almost a year to become the mom I had envisioned me to be. I was not a natural at it at all. Sure, I got the "mom" title as soon as Emma came into the world but it took me sleepless nights, tears, frustration and selflessness into my journey of becoming a mom,  wild at heart.

There is no greater joy then to have little arms around my neck, little whispers, and a daughter who keeps calling for me "mama." It's the sweetest feeling, and the best form of unconditional and unfailing love.

I hope along with my wonderful husband who is an amazing father, to raise Emma in the ways of the Lord.


As for me and my mother, I am blessed with a wonderful mom who has been an amazing rock in my life. One who I can go to with anything and she can just somehow make all things better and right.

Your arms were always open when I needed a hug. Your heart understood when I needed a friend. Your gentle eyes were stern when I needed a lesson. Your strength and love has guided me and gave me wings to fly.

- Sarah Malin

Mothers hold their children's hands for a short while, but their hearts forever.

- Unknown

We never know the love of the parent until we become parents ourselves.  - Henry Ward Beecher

Making a decision to have a child--it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.- Elizabeth Stone

I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life.- Abraham Lincoln

Three Years of Wedded Bliss

Reflecting back on my life as Mrs. Cholakian in the last three years, I can honestly say I'm the luckiest woman alive. 

We are still in the honeymoon stage and really like to keep it that way for the rest of our lives. Love has gotten much deeper, stronger, better and the bond between us, more connected. This last year we had the joy of welcoming our daughter into our family who brought us even closer and has made our lives wonderful in so many ways.

Our journey began with our happy accident meet at Best Buy in April 2006, almost two years later, he proposed to me on his graduation day.

MOV05997

A year later Mr and Mrs Cholakian was established on May 9, 2009.


You just don't know when love will find You but when He does, your whole world will become colorful and wonderful. I am madly in love with him and still have the biggest crush on him.

There is no such thing as the perfect person but there is one who is perfect for you. 

Love Always,

Mrs. Cholakian

Words can either Kill or Give Life.

I like receiving compliments and I also like to give compliments and I mean them. I like to notice the new and nice things and point them out. Most of us don't like to do that thinking our good words might give the person a big head or for whatever reason we refrain from speaking kind words but are quick to criticize or point out the faults instead.

I personally know people who will look for the bad and point that out, overlooking the common, obvious good.

I want to encourage to tell people the things you think positive about them. It will bring life to them. You never know what they may be going through and how your words can lift them up at that moment.

Think of the people in your life who have encouraged you by the power of positive and life-giving words and try to do the same for others.

If You Stay Ready, You Never Have To Get Ready

Yesterday I went to a Safety Training at our Police Services and one of the things I learned that was shocking is that a person cannot yell longer than 15 minutes. Who wants to test that?

There was a lot of material to be covered that was kind of boring but important to know. I like the part about if you're prepared, you can help yourself and then you will be able to help others.

Isn't that true in all aspects of life?

We can't help others if we don't help ourselves first.

We can't love others if we don't love ourselves first.

We can't make someone else happy if we're not happy with ourselves first.

We can't give what we don't have.

So how do we do all of these things for ourselves first?

If you stay ready, you never have to get ready.



Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.' - Mark 12:13

Matthew 6:33-34

The Message (MSG)

 ^30-33"If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.
 ³⁴"Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes. 

EC

Babe Tip #64

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances - Philippians 4:11

When I was single all I wanted to do was to have a boyfriend and then I thought I'd be happy. Then I got a boyfriend and I was happy for a few months and then I thought, I'd be happy once we're engaged. We got engaged and I was happy for awhile until I thought, I'd be happy once we're married. We got married and then the pursuit of happiness never ends. When I was working and pregnant, all I wanted to do was go on maternity leave so I could be happy not working. Then I had Emma and I was home for a couple of months and I missed work and I thought I'd be happy if I go back to work. I came back a month before my planned return and I was happy for a few months until I started missing Emma and now I'm thinking I'd be happy if I could be a stay at home mom. You get the picture? It's like a vicious circle if we don't CHOOSE to be happy and content we will never be once we're there. It will be a temporary high. I have come to the conclusion of such is life and only true happiness comes living a fulfilling life and being content through all circumstances and seasons of life.  This is why I LOVE MY LIFE. It's not perfect and I don't have EVERYTHING but I love everything about it!



As a married woman, I'd tell the singles if you're not happy right now, and with the entire journey, you will never be happy when you get to your destination.

A happy marriage is made up of two happy and whole individuals. One can only add to their spouse's happiness but they can't be responsible for all of it. Does that make sense?


This is also true when it comes to work and everything  else. People dread Mondays and the entire week looking forward to the weekend and then their unhappy and dreading it again on Monday. I hate living life like that. I like to enjoy it every day or else it's such a waste. This doesn't mean that things don't come up or things "happen" in my favor all the time to keep my "happy". You know that's what happiness is. As long as things are "happening" the way we like them to then we are "happy." and that's why it's short lived. But Joy is regardless of what's "happening" we are happy on the inside.

I've never met a miserable, negative person who is happily married. Happiness is a choice and it's your own responsibility. Don't blame anyone else for it , or hold anyone accountable for your happiness, and don't go pulling the record from the past listing reasons why you're not. We don't live in the past anymore. Things might have happened that weren't right but that doesn't give us the insurance to act and behave wrong for the rest of our lives and holding someone else responsible for it, and asking them to pay for someone's consequences.

 EC

5 Things Parents Shouldn't Say To Their Kids

It hurts me when I hear parents speaking to their kids so harshly and without thought of what those words could do to them. Words are actually much much more powerful than actions in some cases. Words can get embedded in our thoughts and hearts and play over and over in our minds. I've been thinking about bullying in school a lot lately and wonder if the bullies come from families who bully their own kids. Parents should set the bar. Parents should set the right example and discipline their children in the way they should go. The Word discipline comes from the word Disciple and it literally means to teach. Often instead of teaching, we punish. Know the difference.  The one I absolutely cannot stand is the last one and it's because I've witnessed it. A few years ago, when I went to pick up my brother from preschool, a mom was driving out of the parking lot with her 3 year old boy running behind the car screaming for her. He probably didn't want to go home and most likely she drove off after telling him "ok, then I'm going to leave without you!"

This morning, I came across this article that hit home for me. I wanted to share parts that stood out for me. For the full article, here is the link. http://shine.yahoo.com/team-mom/5-things-parents-shouldnt-kids-171300904.html

5 Things Parents Shouldn't Say To Their Kids.

1. "I Don't Care." 
Little kids love to share details...of their playground conversations with friends, of the cloud formation they think looks like a sea serpent, of why they squeezed an entire tube of toothpaste into the bathtub. And sometimes? Parents just don't want to hear the specifics. But beware of saying "I don't care!" because you're cutting off communication with your child and saying that something important to him or her isn't so important to you.

2. Act Your Age! 
Pincus says this common reaction is less about the child's behavior and all about the parent trying to manage his or her own frustration. 


3. Say You're Sorry!
You're trying to teach your child to be compassionate, which is a laudable goal. But "forcing a child to apologize does not teach a child social skills," says Bill Corbett, a parent educator, author, and producer/host of the parenting TV show "Creating Cooperative Kids."


4. Don't You Get It?
Implicit in a 'don't you get it' comment are the judgments of 'Why don't you get it?' followed by 'What's wrong with you for not getting it?' While a parent may not mean to send those messages, that is the message the child receives.

5. I'm Going to Leave Without You
"I'm going to leave without you!" For young kids, fear of parental abandonment is very real.

Please be careful with your words. They hurt just as bad if not more than physical pain!

  

Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit—you choose. (Proverbs 18:21 MSG)

El

But what if I don't Feel Like It

Forgiveness is a wonderful idea, until you have to forgive someone.


I read Joyce's devotional today and I was compelled to share the main points.

It made me realize I tend to isolate myself  from the person who I think has hurt me and I try to avoid them.

Here are my take aways from the article. 

If someone has hurt you, don't spend the next 10 years of your life hurting yourself by hanging on to that offense. Most likely, that other person isn't even thinking about you, while you dwell on the incident for years. That only hurts one person—you.


When you forgive someone, you're really helping yourself. 






1) Unforgiveness always keeps score.

In Luke 15:29, the elder brother of the prodigal son said, "Look! These many years I have served you." Peter wanted to know how many times he had to forgive someone. Unforgiveness is always looking at the score. But 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, Love takes no account…. It doesn't count up the evil done to it.




2) Unforgiveness always boasts of its own record.
In Luke 15:29, the older brother of the prodigal son says "These many years I have never done wrong." Judgment always says that I always do good and others do bad.


  3) Unforgiveness always complains.
"You never do anything for me." Ever catch yourself thinking that about someone? This attitude only sees what others aren't doing and doesn't see what they are doing. God's Word clearly shows that we're not supposed to complain. And if you're continuously using your mouth to complain about some incident of offense, you won't get past it. Don't waste time by complaining.

4) Unforgiveness has a martyr syndrome.
"I do all the work." Workaholics are particularly susceptible to this one. Sometimes people who work all the time and don't know how to enjoy their life get jealous when other people are enjoying life. Is there someone who aggravates you when you see them having a good time? If yes, you could have unforgiveness toward them.

5) Unforgiveness always alienates, divides and separates.
When the kids are acting up, we say "my husband's kids" or maybe something like, "What are you going to do about your son?" Those are divisive statements. Maybe you have a coworker who you stay away from as much as possible or a sibling you don't talk to much…why do you separate yourself from them? Maybe you need to forgive that person.

6) Unforgiveness is always envious and jealous when angry at someone who gets blessed.
If someone who has hurt you gets a blessing, it grates on you…at least it did for me until I learned how to forgive.
Forgiveness is a decision—not a feeling. When you pray for people who have hurt you, it's a choice. But there's healing in that for you. Bless and do not curse them means to speak well and not evil of them when that person is not around. And be good to them in various ways as wisdom allows

The Five Year Engagement

We saw The Five Year Engagement with our friends over the weekend and to our surprise it was really good. The reviews we had read prior to the movies we're pretty bad but I thought Jason Segal did a great job with the movie. It was real funny and he got the main point across which is life is about relationships not career and not anything else.

My favorite part in the movie is when the girl (Actress Emily) is having a conversation with her sister in front of her kids and they are talking to each other as Elmo and the Cookie Monster and the whole theme of the movie is what the younger sister says about the cookie!

Go see it!

seemingly innocuous behavior can become an addiction

Recently I read an article by Dr. David B. Hawkins regarding Chat room Addictions. He did an interview with a married man who became friends with his ex and some of his high school girfriends which he ended up chatting with and eventually meeting up for coffee which led to other things. Eventually his wife caught up to him but he justified by saying that everyone is on Facebook. His wife became critical and suspicious. 
He spent more and more time online.
“Cynthia started getting more critical about what I was doing,” Cal shared with me. “She saw the warning signs I couldn’t see. I rationalized them away, telling myself everyone was doing this. Everybody is on Facebook. I asked myself, ‘What harm could come of it?’”
“So,” I said, “you kept reaching further and further into this new world.”
“Yes,” he said. “And I liked it. There were so many women who found me handsome, exciting and interesting. I started keeping some of my activities a secret, which should have been my first warning. But, I thought she was overly jealous.”

“Sounds like this all developed over a long period of time, Cal,” I said. “A little deeper with every step.”

“Yup,” he said. “Before I knew it I was talking to more and more women and I was excluding Cynthia from this secret life. I became preoccupied with who I might meet and how they might find me attractive and interesting.”

Dr. David B. Hawkins concludes his interview with the following. 

Let’s explore how this seemingly innocuous behavior can become an addiction.

First, we deny our pain. Cal wasn’t aware of how vulnerable he was. He had no idea that he was craving attention and encouragement. This denial made him vulnerable to the many opportunities for excitement on the Internet.

Second, chatting makes us feel good. No harm so far, right? Wrong. Anything that alters our mood and behavior should be critically reviewed. Anything that alters our mood has the power and potential to become addicting. We want more of the "drug" to make us feel better.

Third, we deny the impact chatting has upon our lives. We tell ourselves that what we’re doing is innocuous. We tell ourselves we’re not harming anyone, all the while becoming more dangerous with our behavior. We take greater risks, telling ourselves we’re safe.

Fourth, we begin keeping secrets. Because it is dangerous, and we know it is wrong, we start hiding things from our mate. This is a sure sign that we’re on thin ice. Anything we have to hide should make us suspect. We must live lives of transparency and accountability.

Finally, we get legitimate needs met illegitimately. Our needs are not wrong — only the way we are going about getting them met. Cal needed to step back, take an inventory of his life and marriage, and consider how he might spruce up his life. Rather than getting titillation from others, he needed to create these feelings from within his marriage.

Scripture offers us guidance on the matter: “Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth” (Proverbs 5:18). We must seek pleasures from with the safety of our marriage.

While I’m certainly not bashing the Internet, I offer a strong word of caution after seeing countless marriages damaged from unfaithfulness rising largely from Internet opportunities. Be careful. Be open and transparent, and most important, share your needs with each other.

“Wow dad treats me with chivalry”

From boys will be boys by Osh.

Chapter 2 “Wow dad treats me with chivalry” Treat that as you want other men treating them

Now that we did some wife bashing, we can move on to the next step. Our own behavior around our daughter will matter a lot. Treat her like you want the guy to treat her. Be Gentleman. What’s this mean? Bring back chivalry. When she is old enough to understand what it means to open the door for her, do it. Give her the last piece or bite of the pie. Put aside some of your time to have one on one with her and listen to how her day was and what she feels. YES LISTEN WHAT SHE FEELS and has on her mind.

You need to do for your daughter. WHY? This is to show her that she needs to be treated this way, this is how a boy should show her his respect. This is how a man should treat her now and in the future. She starts putting this as things that she likes in a man, and looks for it. Let’s face it not many guys treat women that great these days. This is your way of showing her how it really should work. 

Things you can do: Open her door if it the car door or the house door. Listen to her and the things she has to say, give her one on one time. Tuck and kiss her in goodnight. Support the hobbies and interests she has. Change the channel for the show she likes to watch and watch it with her.

P.S. Treating your wife with chivalry will help this process and have a positive impact in the big picture, ie: open the doors, listen, and spend one on one time.

The best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother

 Boys will Be boys...by Osh.

Chapter 1 “He really shows my mom he loves her” and really sell this action

First step a father can take to secure/establish/ensure the foundation of a daughter that will follow in the right footsteps. This may be hard for some men, it also may come to some as a surprise, but to establish solid foundation of a safe upbringing of your daughter is to love her mother and show it(if you don’t love her, at least pretend to love her). Seriously though this doesn’t only apply to girls but boys to. The best thing you can do for your children is to love and show your love to their mother. Sometimes we can get frustrated with our spouse/wife/girlfriend, you just want to punch them in the face and tell them to shut the F up, but ultimately we have to put that aside, dig deep and really show the kids the true reason why we still stand with our wives or significant others in front of them.

Our spouses will be there after the kids grow up and move out, this is the one person who understands you, loves, and cares about you. MORE IMPORTANTLY they are the ones who have tolerated our SHIT, the ridiculous behavior throughout the years, the sports watching, drinking, looking at other chicks, the list goes on. We have to be honest with ourselves, without our significant other we wouldn’t take showers, or go to the doctor for check-ups. We really have a lot to thank and love her for, SO SHOW IT FRONT OF THE KIDS. You’ll thank me later.

Boys Will Be Boys..but they can do better.

Over the last two years, Hubby has been writing some good material on boys, how they are and how they outta treat their girls. Now that he is a father, his prespecitve has changed a bit and I think he has become a better writer on giving tips to guys and to our duaghter in the future who will be dating them.

I am going to be sharing some excerpts from his writings. I love reading his stuff.
Sometimes, I get a kick out of the fact that I'm married to this brilliant, smart, funny, sexy man.

Giving up the Myths about Protein- Like changing your Religion.

I can’t begin to tell you how often I get asked the question “how do you get your protein?” or “what about protein?” when people find out I don’t really eat meat. 

“Remember those four basic food group charts that we all saw in every classroom in elementary school? Protein had its own box, designed by a thick steak, a whole fish, and an entire chicken. Dairy foods had their own special box as well. A healthy diet we were taught, supposedly centered on meat and milk. Protein was taught to be the most favorable of all nutrients and lots of protein was taught to be the key to strength, health, and vigor. Unfortunately, cancer rates soared. According to research, we had to rethink what we had taught. Americans still cling to what they were taught. “

Any combination with natural foods will supply you with the protein you need. 

Which has more protein? 

Oatmeal, ham or tomato? They all have the same amount of protein per calorie. The difference is, tomato and the oatmeal are packaged with fiber and other disease fighting nutrients and ham is packaged with cholesterol and saturated fat.