Your baby needs a Family

Notes from Babywise chapter 1

Too often, parents lose sight of this fact, getting lost in a parenting wonderland of photos, footsteps and first words. Baby becomes central to their existence. Yet the greatest overall influence you will have on your child will not come in your role as an individual parent, but in your joint role as husband and wife.

Great marriages produce great parents.

A healthy husband-wife relationship is essential to the emotional health of children in the home. When there is harmony in the marriage, there is an infused stability with the family. A strong marriage provides a haven of security for children as they grow in the nurturing process.

The goal of parenting is not simply to avoid excessive anxiety, but to create a world of confidence by what we do with each other as by what we avoid doing.

To be a good mom or dad, all you need is to continue as before.

To improve the quality of the parent-child relationship, parents first must continue to evaluate the quality of their relationship with each other.

Too often when a child enters a family, parents leave their first love: each other.

Rather than welcoming children to the family, children are treated as the center of the family universe.

Achieving balance:

1. Life doesn’t stop once you have a baby. It may slow down for a few weeks but it doesn’t stop.

2. Date your spouse. If you had a weekly date before the baby, get back in the swing of it as soon as possible. A friend or relative is capable of meeting your child’s needs and the baby will not suffer separation anxiety from one night. If you never had a date night, start now!

3. Continue those loving gestures you enjoyed before the baby came along.

4. Invite friends over.

5. At the end of each day have “couch time” talking about the day’s events which takes place before the children go to bed. This will demonstrate expression of togetherness. Children actually are assured of mom and dad’s love relationship through this tangible demonstration.

To excel in parenting, protect your marriage. Also resolve to be your child’s parent, not a peer. Potential peers are everywhere. Yet the child has only one mom and dad. Don’t let your baby down. Governing that life is in your child’s best interest.

Friendship with your child is a positive long-term objective, so exercise patience. Today, your child needs your guiding hand. Yes, welcome him or her as a wonderful addition to the family, but never place your child at its center. Instead, build a team spirit. When parents plan for family unity, everyone wins. Only then will life as you know it never be the same. Really, it just got richer.